


He'd Take A Bullet for Her While She's Pulling the Trigger

by arithmadick2_0 (orphan_account)



Category: Scorpion (TV 2014)
Genre: 2.24 aftermath, Adults, Angst, Character Development, Drinking, F/M, Failed Proposal, Hurt, Rooftop Talk, blame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-15
Updated: 2016-09-15
Packaged: 2018-08-15 03:00:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8039872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/arithmadick2_0
Summary: They're handling things like adults, no matter how scary that is.





	He'd Take A Bullet for Her While She's Pulling the Trigger

**Author's Note:**

> I could go on and on but this fic is them handling things as they should truly be handled like adults. 
> 
> Thanks Tara and Sarah (I just realized that rhymed I need to go to bed I'm exhausted) a lot changes in a year. 
> 
> I don't own anythign and s3 is going to suck lmao.

* * *

Flicking on the light switch in the hall to her too-cold apartment, she shakes off her boots and goes to try to shower off the past 24 hours.

 

As Happy strips, letting her clothes fall into a crinkled pile at her feet, she can't stop hearing the words play like a broken record; his stupid song, the proposal, and her saying no, saying no because she was married, saying no because she didn't tell him like she should've, saying no because despite how much she put on him to not ruin them, she decided to do it herself in that moment.

 

She shakes her head and looks at herself in the mirror, her makeup has smudged off throughout the day and she's sure a scalding shower will do a good job of cleaning the rest of her raw. Raw, she thinks, like the burn of the tequila flowing down Toby's throat as he downs the bottle he found. Raw like the sound of his heart being torn in two by her mechanical hands and left to rot.

 

'Dammit.' She whispers under her breath, barely keeping herself from punching the mirror. Happy steps into the shower and tries to let the sting of the water distract her. It doesn't work.

* * *

 

 Although he knows he has the garage to himself since he sent Mr. 197 off to catch his love, he gets enough sense to call Cabe and ask him to drive him home. He finishes the bottle because it's ridiculous to leave so little left.

 

'About as empty as me, as Happy.' Toby digs his hands into his hair to stop the invasive thoughts but it's too little, too late and all he can see is the way she backed away into the corner until he had to make her listen to his proposal. Blinking, the theme changes to her saving him from the acid and he wonders for just a moment if burning to death because of Mark would have been as painful as the royal slap in the face he got from her.

 

Hearing Cabe pull up he stumbles outside and throws himself into the too-small-to-be-comfortable car. The older man rubs his shoulder for a minute before saying things will be better when they can talk in the morning. Toby bitterly spits that he's done talking for now.

 

"I'm too sick in love to not be able to forgive her, but I'm not an idiot. It's up to her to fix this mess."

* * *

 

 Towel-drying her hair Happy can't believe that this all happened. She debates swallowing the mouthwash instead of spitting but knows that she's done enough running for a lifetime and it won't work now.

 

Taking a look at the small scar between her breasts, received from a drunk foster father who she barely got away from, she digs her nails into her skin enough to leave marks over the tissue. She used to look at it as a symbol of who she was- scarred and no longer willing to give any of herself to anyone. Now it makes her think of how she gave herself to the doctor a very long time ago, before they'd kissed, before they'd saved the world, before she even knew she was capable of loving again.

 

Her hand rips away from the patch of flesh and she quickly dresses. She's glad now that all of their extracurricular activities happened at his apartment, knowing that she wouldn't be able to handle the presence of him tonight. Slipping into bed, Happy takes the pillow and screams into it, tries to suffocate herself with it, and doesn't succeed in anything but feeling more and more guilty with each passing moment.

 

'It's your fault, you should've told him and he would've been upset but he would have been forgiving. You had to get married,' her brain taunts her. 'But for some god forsaken reason you didn't think you needed to tell him you were, still? Why didn't you get a divorce? You've fucked up, but not like this, and despite your previous situations you should have been grown enough to tell him. It's been years, and this one's all on you." Turning, she pulls the bottle of NyQuil out of her dresser drawer and takes two shots, knowing it's the only thing that's going to make her brain turn off for the night. She thinks she wouldn’t mind if she didn’t come to the next morning.

* * *

 

 Cabe makes sure Toby's in his apartment and settled before leaving.

 

"Call me if you need anything, kiddo," he tells Toby before heading out and the latter nods before going to the bathroom. Not looking at himself, he brushes his teeth and moisturizes his face before turning off the light. Toby can only imagine how awful he looks but knows it's nothing in comparison to how horrible he feels. His stomach is a raging fire and his brain pounds too loud for him to realize it's better to have these symptoms now than the heartache he'll suffer tomorrow.

 

Grabbing a blanket that won’t smell like her and crawling into bed, Toby throws her pillow off the side of the bed and turns to face the bathroom in order to make himself fall asleep.

* * *

 

 She doesn't go in in the morning. Walter told them all, before the wreck of last night, to take some time off to recover, tells Toby to see a doctor and because of her Happy doesn't know if he'll take that advice to a doctor or to a shrink.

 

Pulling herself out of bed, the mechanic heads to the kitchen and tries to conjure up an appetite for something, anything. There’s a knocking in the back of her head that she needs to take care of herself and she's barely able to avoid hearing Toby’s concerned voice reminding her to eat and stay hydrated.

 

It doesn’t take long before Happy’s eaten and changed into workout clothes. Her body aches from the previous days but there’s too much pent up emotion in her to not work out. The back door locks behind her as she jogs down the stairs and out the revolving door of her apartment and once on the bike trail breaks into a heavy sprint, determined to sweat out all of the pain she’s worked up over the last few days.

* * *

 Toby wakes up too early, it’s not yet sunrise and he sighs, his body is like a clock and once it’s awake it won’t fall back asleep until night. He stands and gets a drink of water, trying to replace the alcohol in his system with carbs and soda and a Charlie Brown movie that his dad always set up for him to watch when he was sick. It’s too loud and then too quiet and all he can hear is static.

 

Sighing, Toby gets up from the couch a few hours later and takes a long, hot shower. He makes sure to check himself over and set out ice and heat packs for after. Although he doesn’t regret his decision to not get looked at in a hospital, he wishes he wouldn’t have gotten so drunk last night and had the opportunity to look over himself sooner. The warm water feels good as he loofahs off all the dirt and blood from the previous day, seeing how his arms and ankles are mottled with bruises from the sociopath. For as many metaphors that run through his head about the whole damn situation, he chooses to push them aside and look at what happened for what it is: a kidnapping, rescue, and horrid lack of trust from Happy. Looking at himself in the mirror once dry, he decides that even though he loves her this one will take time to heal from, time that he deserves.

* * *

 They see each other for the first time in a week and Happy asks to talk on the roof, away from everyone else. Toby is still wary of her but he agrees, knowing this is her first step in a long marathon of rectification that will happen.

 

“I’m sorry, Toby.” Are the first words out of her mouth and she feels the weight on her chest crush her more knowing that so much more needs to be said and so much could and should have been done to prevent the sticky predicament they’re in now.

 

“For everything,” she continues. “From Collins taking you to to my massive fuck up.” She tries for a chuckle but Toby only exhales and takes another sip of coffee. While it’s hard to be mad when he can see she’s trying her hardest, he needs her to see his feelings, too. Toby notices her spinning the rings on her fingers and anyone would be able to see how she’s nervous. She’s looking at him and he knows it’s his turn to talk. She’s terrified he’s going to yell, scream in her face (as much as she feels she’d deserve that), but he doesn’t. His words are soft spoken like always. He knows how to handle her gently even after all the damage she’s caused.

 

“Listen, Hap, I’m going to be brutally honest with you right now but I need you to hear me out, okay?” He takes her wrist and guides them both to sit, the connection feeling different, more like friends than lovers.

 

“I know you know this, but you really messed up. Although it devastates me that you’re married, the fact that you didn’t trust me enough to tell me is what truly hurts. I know it wasn’t your intention but the blame for this is yours to bear and find a way to cope with. I cannot and will not just let this go or dust it under the rug for the sake of you feeling better. I would have been a little upset if you did open up to me when we first started dating, or even a few weeks in, but I would have been able to forgive you and help you move forward from it. Now, I still am going to try to help you, but we, us, have to go back to square one. In short, this is a break up. There is no way a relationship will work if the foundations of trust and openness with one another aren’t there. Those are things that start in friendship.” Her eyes are downcast but he can tell she’s listening to his words so he takes a deep breath and continues.

 

“Look at me. I know you are scared of me abandoning you but I will promise you right now that is never going to happen, Happy, whether we’re married or friends or anything else. I love you, in every way imaginable, and you need to think about that when you think that fixing us isn’t worth it. Because I can’t help you with that. You have to decide that you want to let me in past your walls no matter how terrifying and vulnerable. Until you take steps into finding your own sense of security, then I can’t do anything to further this relationship. As you grow and become better, then we’ll heal and progress in a relationship again. Because me freezing you out and refusing to talk will only prolong the issues so I won’t do that to you. Does this all make sense? “This one is on you and it’s going to take a hell of a lot more than flowers and an ‘I’m sorry’ to fix it.” His eyes meet hers and it feels like the world has stopped. She nods and clears her throat.

 

“Y-yeah, it does.” She sighs, unsure of where to go from here. All she wants is to have told him six months ago, to have saved them from this.

 

“I want to fix this, Toby. I don’t know how long it will take me to do so, but I will.” Biting her lower lip she looks down at her hands again and Toby nods.

 

“Sounds like a plan, Hap. This is our relationship, not the team’s, so I’ll get everyone off your back and keep them from butting in, I promise. I’m here to talk if you want, as friends or a shrink, and coming to me with things will be good baby steps.” Toby stands, taking a few steps and patting her shoulder.

 

“I know this girl who would do anything for those around her to be happy, no matter how hard it was. I think she should start doing the same for herself.”

 

Happy hears the roof door close and doesn’t know where to start on fixing them besides that she wants to.

 

Toby walks down the stairs to his desk and sits, pulling out two psychology books and starting to read.


End file.
